Life as a rough draft

Autumn in Oxford

2010-11-18T08:41:00.000-08:00

Fog is creeping along "on cat's feet" through the streets of Oxford, giving the glorious fall colors a mystical feel. I can hardly believe it's almost Thanksgiving. Nick and I pulled out the camera not long ago for an after-church photo shoot to capture Liam in action at our house. I am amazed at how much he's changed in just the past few months!

Remember, remember the 5th of November

2010-11-05T04:57:00.000-07:00

All over England tonight, people will commemorate the failed assasination of King James I in 1605 with Guy Fawkes Night. The holiday is named for Guy Fawkes, one of 12 conspirators--and the one who happened to be caught red-handed at midnight in the basement of the House of Lords with 36 barrels of gunpowder--enough to reduce Parliament to rubble.

According to J.A. Sharpe, Fawkes is sometimes referred to, jokingly, as "the only man ever to enter Parliament with honest intentions." Ha!

Every year on Nov. 5, people celebrate with fireworks, bonfires, notoriously riotous behavior and the occasional burning of an effigy of Guy (Yes, these bitter people throw a stuffed doll--a "Guy" on the bonfire just for spite). Sometimes they substitute other current hated public figures. I'm afraid to know who they'll throw on the fire this election season!

The self-proclaimed "commoners" of Wolvercote have put together a doozy of a bonfire beside the Plough Inn, just at the end of our street. The bonfire is as big as a small house and contains no less than three dressers, four picnic tables and countless felled trees. Our family will join the village in a BBQ where we'll eat "jacket" potaotes (baked potatoes) around the fire and watch fireworks--they've kindly moved the cows off the Green just for the occasion.

Maybe we'll "have a go" at some of these other traditional Nov. 5 foods while we're there: Bangers and Mash (sausages and mashed potatoes), Black Treacle (Molasses), Toffee Apples, Black Peas with Vinegar, and Potato pie with Pickled Red Cabbage. Yum!

I'll leave you with a traditonal rhyme that commemorates the failed Gunpowder Plot. It sums up the story well, even if does end rather viciously:

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent
To blow up the King and Parli'ment.
Three-score barrels of powder below
To prove old England's overthrow;
By God's providence he was catch'd (or by God's mercy*)
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holla boys, Holla boys, let the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
And what should we do with him? Burn him!

(Pictures to come!)

Just say no.

2010-10-13T15:28:00.000-07:00

Ne. La. Ochi. Hapana. Non. Uh-uh. Naw. When pigs fly. I found a website with the word "no" in over 250 languages for a little inspiration. "No" in English is only two letters. How can such a short word be so difficult to utter?

Collective wisdom advises that in order to live an effective life, you have to learn to say no. I've heard this advice so many times, the phrase is rendered meaningless. What does it actually mean to learn to say no and how could it be life-changing?

Half of that battle for me is deciding which activities and responsibilities are worth inclusion in 24 hours of my day and which are not. The other half of the battle is facing the constant demands on my time, money and energy and communicating that decision with the resolve of a running back greasing through 300 pound linemen. (Take note of my visual of Marion the Barbarian Barber, Dallas running back, here.)

Resolve is the key. Crumbling under the intensity of puppy-dog eyes and "desperate" needs that aren't truly desperate is far too easy.

I'll just tell you--I don't often make it through the linemen in the "no" department. I usually end up meandering around the field. I stop to chat with the linemen, find out how the mascot is doing, help a cheerleader fix her hair, stop for a sip of Gatorade and find myself in line for a hot dog all before I know what happened.

I thought I should post about saying "no" after a phone conversation I had yesterday. I was planning to call in a favor of help to paint furniture. One thing led to another in the phone conversation and I hung up with no painting help and a new responsibility to cook dinner for ten people. I'm not even sure how it happened!

Before you start raising money to send me to assertiveness classes, I will acknowledge the dinner was a blessing and fit in well with our priorities for the week. And we'll do the painting later. But the way my plans can so easily sway in the throes of the thoughts and feelings of others was sobering indeed!

Why don't I say no? Am I afraid of hurting someone else's feelings? Afraid of the way it will make me look? Afraid of being or appearing selfish? Afraid I'm not being servant-hearted enough? Afraid of confrontation? Afraid of missing an opportunity that could be life-changing?

As a believer, I think I am called to have a different perspective on "yes" and "no" than the world. I don't have to be driven by a "me" culture where I am the center of the universe. I am called to lay down my life.

But the reality is that no one can say yes to everything. If I don't choose to say no to some things on the front end, I will end up saying no to them by default when I run out of time to give them my attention.

Often, those who suffer my "default nos" are those I love the most. Do I have time to be considerate and calm with my husband? Time to be patient with my child? Time to pray? Time to live life without feeling like I am always running for the bus? So yes, I want to be eager to serve, to love, to give, to volunteer and to make sacrifices. I must also pray for wisdom that I can choose carefully how I will invest the hours God has given me in the areas in which He's called me.

Here's a link I found interesting on "Seven ways to say no." I'm not necessarily endorsing this website as a whole (and even this post I'm linking could be taken as a little manipulative), but I laughed when I read it and have to say it might just come in handy next time I am trying to say no!

(This advice beats telling people you need to stay home and wash your hair or read the expiration dates on your dairy products.)

Enjoy!

~Laura Lee

Everything I need to know I learned from Chinese acrobats

2010-09-12T16:11:00.000-07:00

What does a balanced life look like?

The new school year is like New Year's for me when it comes to making resolutions. I LOVE fresh starts and I welcome the opportunity to plan how "this term, we can get our act together."

Nick and I were talking about to-do list and goals and what life would look like for the new term and I found myself rattling off my usual list of all the aspects of my life I wanted to keep in balance. I am now starting to wonder what balance actually looks like.

I mean, type in a google search of "balance" and you can find all kinds of crazy images of superhuman feats. Check out this photo, for instance.

Weird, amazing and totally superfluous, these Chinese circus performers are teaching me a lesson. Sure, everything is in balance, but do I want my life to be in balance in a Chinese circus performer kind of way? This is my plea for a simple life.

Sure, it's fun for people to ask "How do you do it all?" and feel some sense of accomplishment from the sheer number of things we are tackling in life right now. But we need to evaluate if we are carrying around more than is necessary--or bordering on the ridiculous. Are we doing what we must do and doing it well? I want to. Do I try to accomplish too much trying to be the superhero that nobody can be?

Do I really want my life to be a constant circus act, "in balance" but just barely, always flirting with dramatic collapse if one thing goes awry? I want to find the kind of balance that doesn't need a fancy pink costume and isn't done for the sake of wowing the crowd. A grounded life, at home with my God and who He made me to be.

Yes, I suppose I will always need to keep the plates spinning, and no one can fully remove the performer in me, but I will try to keep the acrobatics to a minimum.

But I'm going to need help. I have no idea, really, how to simplify my life. In fact, on any given day, I have more things I'd like to add to it--a new friend I want to meet, a new language I want to learn, a place I want to visit, a book I want to write. Then there's my husband and child who actually want to eat every single day! And there's just not enough life to fit it all in at once. So, no easy solutions here. Just trying to keep it all in balance.
How do you do it?

Laura Lee

Home sweet home

2010-08-28T14:56:00.000-07:00

We've finally moved in to our cozy little cottage in Wolvercote on the edge of Oxford. (Complete with recycling opportunities as you will notice from the lovely plastic container strategically placed in the corner of this otherwise picturesque photo.)
We're close to town, but just village enough not to have a house number ... just the name of the cottage and "First Turn" with a post code! How is English is that?
Liam has his own room (Hallelujah!). We can scoot just down the street for fish and chips, stroll along the canal and watch boats go by or supervise cows and sheep grazing in Port Meadow. We can bike to town center in 15 minutes (Er, theoretically. It actually took me 22 --but Nick says I am a slowpoke. I was pulling a bike trailer, a 23 pound child and a week's worth of groceries at the time, so I think slow would be an appropriate adjective for my cycling that day, thank you very much! Anyway, I digress.)
Thanks for praying for us as we searched for the right spot. God was so gracious to provide a home just when we needed one, with fabulous Christian landlords to boot. We are thrilled to embrace the community of Wolvercote and dedicate our home as a place of refuge for weary travelers, a light for searching scholars, a gathering place for people who like to have fun and fertile ground for growing together as a family in the Lord. Or maybe just as a good place to eat lasagna on a weeknight and pray for God's grace.
Ahh. I feel life slow down just as I turn the corner to our street. Please come and visit! Take a right at the "first turn" and follow the church bells pealing. You'll see us peeking out from behind a sturdy English hedge, waving you toward our corner.

8 habits to adopt before college

2010-07-26T08:01:00.000-07:00

Here's a post that originated as an encouragement for a few homeschoolers I know who are looking ahead to college. But come to think of it, these are just important elements for success and confidence in life in general (IMHO of course). What's on your list?

Pick up your pencil (or keyboard!)

Write as much as possible. This really is a key to success in college and future jobs. You have to be an effective communicator no matter what your field.

Get involved in your community

Pursue a variety of extracurricular activities and take advantage of volunteer opportunities. Interact with people of many different ages and walks of life. Grow as you share their stories!

Read

Love to read. Learn to read and research topics you are interested in on your own.

Take initiative

Take initiative. Don't have a great group in your town for a hobby your want to pursue? Start something! Be the person people count on to make things happen.

Invest in people

Love people and take time to figure out how they work. Be a good friend; actually listen; learn to think of others before yourself. Remember people's names. Invest in helping others grow. Don't use people as a means to an end.

Be humble

Be humble. Remember that your situation is only a result of God's gifts to you and you are a steward of those gifts. Use them wisely. Know that there will always be someone better than you at something, but keep your confidence and be the best you can be. Cheer others on and help them succeed!

Seek mentors

Remember to seek out mentors. Don't just wait for a great mentor relationship to happen: identify people you respect and approach them. You likely learned the skill of conversing with adults and people other than those within a year of your own birthday as a homeschooler. Capitalize on this and seek out people to help you grow.

Develop friendships with professors and learn from stimulating conversations. Most professors are happy to get to know a student who truly wants to learn and your experience will be ten times better than if you doze through your classes waiting for them to end.

Consider not just what career you want to have but what kind of person you want to be. Make this a time to shape your character.

Keep your relationship with God central. He's the one who never leaves you or forsakes you and the One you will still be intimate with when all your college memories have faded and your roommates aren't around anymore. Fall in love with him more everyday and be faithful.

This can be an incredible season of your life: enjoy it to the fullest!

Removing Layers: The Beauty of Again and Again

2010-06-27T02:22:00.000-07:00

Last night around midnight, I finished up the last of the day's household chores. I wanted to stay up and get them done so I could have a fresh start tomorrow with everything checked off the list. With the reward of "being done" firmly fixed in my mind, I washed the dishes from my late-night pizza crust baking for guests that would arrive tomorrow and tackled one of my least favorite jobs--scrubbing the toilet and bathtub and taking out the trash.

Liam woke up at 5 this morning and decided to start the day. I attempted to help him help him get back to sleep for two hours with no luck. So, we proceeded with breakfast. I opened a can of prunes (aka controlled mess) depitted and spread them all over his high chair tray, along with a lots of pieces of mushy banana. Liam LOVES prunes and he loves feeding himself. And the prunes loved him if attachment is any sign of affection. Every inch of grinning Liam was covered in prunes and banana by the end of the meal.

I gave him a bath in the freshly cleaned tub, too tired to even grimace about the potential impact on the cleaning I had just done. Bathing dirty little boys are what tubs are made for!

Not more than two hours into our day, the sink is now full of breakfast dishes, the freshly cleaned tub coated with a layer of prunes and banana. Thank goodness the trash can is at least filling again slowly.
And I must clean those things before lunch!

I am struck by the power of the things that must be done again and again.

Days like this sometimes make me want to throw in my scrub brush. What's the point? It will all just get messy again right away. I remember a friend (mother of five) once said to me. "You have to think of cleaning a house with children like removing layers. Yes, the freshly mopped floor may have a glass of juice spilled on it within seconds, but it is at least one layer less dirty than it would have been."

So true!! And the more I think about it, there is something beautiful in the service of things that must be done again. They are a quiet service to my family, a part of the fiber of our home. Think of the constancy and beauty in breathing, sunsets, whispered prayers,waking up--all must be done again and again.

I consider God's mercy as he disciplines me and guides me and forgives me and over and over listens to my prayers. He doesn't neglect me just because he has "been there done that." He is a constant of unconditional love.

So as I head for the bathroom to remove a couple layers from the tub, I smile to myself. I'm thankful for the reminder that God is an expert on things that need doing again and again and I'm so glad He is. Maybe when these chores are "done," I'll find myself reflecting a little bit more of Him.

Mission accomplished: We found a home!

2010-06-26T12:56:00.000-07:00

This is a spoiler post, hopefully soon to be followed by pictures of our new place. But people are living there until the end of the month and I just couldn't wait that long to tell you we FOUND A PLACE TO LIVE!!!! After emailing, viewing, calling and, ahem, stalking over 50 places, we mentioned our house hunt to a friend at church who just so happened (what?!) to be renting a picturesque little cottage in a village on the outskirts of Oxford, within our time frame and our price range. That very day, we went over for tea, viewed the house and enjoyed getting to know our church friends a little better. (Did I mention the cottage shares a driveway with their home, which is my dream house (aged timbers, stone walls, cool textures, lots of trees, a lily pond in the garden out back). So the cottage gets cool points just for proximity to our friends AND their amazing home.
I wouldn't say it's perfect ...The cottage doesn't have any closets, and if anyone has to go to the bathroom, you have to take a tour through the entire house, jump over a sleeping baby and waltz through our bedroom to go, but it is perfect for our situation right now and an absolute knock my socks off blessing from the Lord. He has such great timing. There's even a corner store for last-minute groceries, a bus stop and a playground, an old fashioned English Inn/Pub just down the street. We can bike to the city in 15 minutes and we're super close to a woodsy-looking bike path that has promise (need to buy those bikes soon!).
We walked past the house at twilight last week and listened to the village church bells pealing and the goodnight song of thrushes, breathed in honeysuckle and watched the sun melt like butter and spread out over Port Meadow. What a sense of peace and provision. I look forward to making this place home.

Hunting for houses ... searching for perfection?

2010-06-07T15:16:00.000-07:00

The perfect house will make me perfect. Or at least that's the false impression I was under a few weeks ago as I feverishly searched classifieds and online postings, researched neighborhoods and scanned photos looking for classy furnishings, wood floors and stainless steel to catch my eye (all with a bargain price tag, right? Not gonna happen).
I don't think I would have taken it so far as to think the house would actually make me perfect, but I was certainly hoping it would make me more organized, efficient, happy, stylish, sociable and peaceful--pretty tall order for four walls and a roof, don't you think? I know it sounds ridiculous, but I pretty much was certain that all that would happen as soon as we unpacked boxes in a new place (and I implemented the perfect new organization system, of course.)
As the search went on, with little promise of finding anything close to perfect, the threat that I may need to make do in less than ideal circumstances came to mind (shock of shocks). It was then that I realized how much weight I was putting on my "new" house to bring about a sense of well-being and identity. I wanted to be one of the cool kids in the neighborhood.
The silliness with which I was engaging came to life in a blog post I read not long ago. The article I stumbled upon was written by a gal who was always on the move. She described her realization that the perfect house wasn't going to be her fulfillment in life.
As obvious as that sounds, I realized that as much as I LOVE fresh starts, a new apartment, no matter how great--or not so great--will not make or break my life or significantly alter who I am.
It's so easy to think that with the right kind of storage space or the right kind of artistic flavor to a place, I will suddenly be more organized, have more free time, be a better wife and friend and mother, and pretty much just get cooler in general. If your place says a lot about you, by golly, I want it to say good things!
While I haven't given up on striving to be the best I can be, I am reminded that I won't be unpacking a newer, better version of myself on moving day. So I pass my reminder on to you: It's great to strive to improve yourself, but be careful you don't set up an idol of sorts by living in the "if onlys."
In my current apartment, in the skin I happen to be in, with all my flaws and strengths, I can live by grace day by day, strive to grow, and forget the race for a better image or a quick fix that a certain material possession or life circumstance can provide.
Contentment ... what a challenging and rewarding lesson this can be! I pray I can be content in all circumstances and the deep joy that is my wellspring would flow to those around me ... whether those around me are lounging on brushed Italian leather couches or pulling up a mismatched straight back from the charity shop.
I'll let you know when we find the perfect house ;)

Defining Adventure

2010-05-17T15:32:00.000-07:00

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered." - G.K. Chesterton

We certainly have had our share of adventures and chance-of-a-lifetime moments in the last couple of months. Hopefully we considered them in the right manner! In March and April, Nick, Liam and I traveled to France, Israel and Austria.

I plan to detail our adventures a bit more soon, but thought I would let you know what we've been up to (and why Liam looks like a Bedouin baby in the photo below--the sun was intense!).

We walked where Jesus walked in the Galilee, spoke ancient Greek among ruins in northern Israel, prayed for the church at the Western Wall and walked the ramparts of the city of Jerusalem.

We battled volcanic ashcloud in our quest to return to Oxford and spent five whirlwind days in Vienna, Calais and Dover trying to get home. The process involved a 20-hour bus ride, two attempts (including security with the baby!) to fly out, amazing Christian hospitality and lots of gelato and apple strudel.

We're now settling back into Oxford life, looking for a new apartment to fit our growing 10-month-old and preparing for Phd. studies that start this fall. Whew. Our next goal is to stay home for a bit of normalcy and enjoy welcoming spring to Oxford.

A good read

2010-03-06T15:21:00.000-08:00

I have a suspicion that Liam (7-month-old son) and Nick (Phd. candidate husband) have been studying together.

My first clue was the stack of books on the window sill tonight. Sandwiched between Greek Grammar and Penitential Prayer Traditions were Goodnight Moon and Dr. Suess's ABCs. And on top of Ancient Texts for New Testament Studies? Sandra Boyton's But Not the Hippopotamus.

Just had to smile at that collection. I love the mix of life in our home.

I suppose if Liam starts spouting Greek or Nick begins speaking in rhyme only, I'll know why.

---------

I am thrilled that Liam is already developing an appreciation for good books (even if, for now, that appreciation involves chewing the pages). We hope to encourage his penchant for learning. Great stories are one of the best ways to open up the world of ideas for our little boy as he grows.

When you love to read, you can learn anything. I am hoping that by making reading a part of Liam's life from the beginning, he will be inspired to step into the lives, cultures and ideas of others through great stories for a lifetime.

Here are a few reasons I appreciate a book-centered education and why I think we might want to use lots of "living" books to educate Liam (obviously a lot of this will come into play down the road!):

-Facts and figures fade from the memory quickly, but everyone remembers a good story. I'd much rather "get" the concepts and realities of life during World War II from a biography or historical fiction than from a dry paragraph in a textbook or a list of battles.

-When we discuss the dilemmas characters must face between the pages of the books we read, we can guide Liam into the process of critical thinking and ethical decision making BEFORE he has to face many of those scenarios in real life. Certain books may spark important discussions that might rarely come up in the everyday swing of things.

-Great writing is born out of great reading. Wide reading exposes you to the rhythms and musicality of language, the power of just the right word, the "pop" of onomatapoeia, the undeniable appeal of a catchy hook in your first paragraph.

-The patterns of plot helps us understand the world. I believe we all adopt a narrative to explain where we've come from, why we're here, who's in charge, why beauty exists, why we're broken, where we're going. God's metanarrative is amazing—He's a master storyteller.

So now that I have finished lauding good books for the time being, please share your book recommendations with me! Share your favorite, your most life-changing, your favorite book to make fun of, or just what happens to be on your nightstand right now.

Here's my latest library stash (each gets a nibble whenever I get a chance):

The Gospel in a Pluralist Society by Leslie Newbigin (FABULOUS! Such a challenge and a confidence builder as I share Christ with non-believers)

Michelangelo and the Pope's Ceiling by Ross King (fun non-fiction book about the history of the Sistene Chapel and all the scheming and intrigue between powers that were and the artists of the day)

Welcome to Everytown: A Journey into the English Mind by Julian Baggini (Just about to start this, no idea what to expect)

Get a Toned Body in Fifteen Minutes Per Day already went back to the library early. Just sayin.'

(Not saying whether I am completely toned or whether I just gave up. )

A pit or a well?

2010-03-01T02:18:00.000-08:00

Sometimes in life you are called to dig deep. Whether you dig a pit or a well is up to you.

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I am farther from the blue sky and radiant sun, descending into quiet and shadows, away from the crowds and admiring faces. I often am merely aware of the dark walls surrounding me, of the effort of the digging, the repetitive movement, muscle aching at the dance they know so well.

The sweat drains in rivulets down my back and tiny droplets hover, suspended on the tip of my nose, then let go in a torturingly slow drop …drop… drop. The very thought of the never-ending task makes me want to close my mind. Work unrewarded—no applause and flowers and curtain call at the end. Just those walls getting higher.

I am digging. But perhaps I am not digging a pit after all. Digging deep, sweating, and persevering in order to bring about something productive and life-giving. Sheer drops of refreshment, an oasis for the thirsty. Instead of a pit, I am digging a well.

From the bowels of the earth will spring streams of water, quenching the thirsty ground, running in enthusiastic little rivers at first, then filling and flooding and pouring in to make an abundant reservoir, a welcome sign to weary travelers, a sparkle of hope for those lost in the desert, a gathering place for community, a place of connection and belonging and daily life happenings.

Will I become a woman who is not just broad but deep? Will I search after wisdom and cry for her in the streets? Will I serve the Lord in only the ways of my own choosing or as He has called me? Will I work to grow and become a resource and help to many—and will it ever happen without self-sacrifice?

-------------

Many days, I am just moving dirt, sweating a lot, and watching the earthen walls get taller around me. "A pit!" my soul cries out in alarm. "Go back to safety, don't dig so deep. Maybe moving this earth is futile after all." But once in awhile, I see a productive trickle that might just turn into a stream one day. I want to bring life and refreshment to people around me. Fill me up, Lord, with your abundance and make this dry pit live! Use me.

An oasis of life-giving refreshment, a reservoir to share with others, a place for community, hope for those lost in the desert and thirst-quenching goodness for a parched body. Only through Christ can I become a vessel to serve others in this way. He is the only one who offers this kind of life. I am humbled that He can use my "clay and earth" imperfect self to offer His goodness to others. He never runs dry.

Moments that made me smile

2010-02-03T01:47:00.000-08:00

Ahh ... the little things in life that make me smile. Whispers of God's presence and joy in the every day. Here are a few moments from this winter that made my heart full with gratitude for what God has given me--whether it was sunshine in the snow or the fact that Liam suddenly resembled a little alien in the midst of a wardrobe change in a busy day.

"Sister Friends"

2010-01-16T15:09:00.000-08:00

Growing up as the only girl in a family of three boys had it's advantages.

I learned to climb trees like a pro, but always had someone around to mow the grass so I didn't have to. I got to meet all my brothers' cute (older) friends, always had a great swing dance partner or someone strong to help me carry a heavy load, served as the resident expert on girls for all my brothers, and generally got to be the rose among the thorns (ha, in my own humble opinion ).

I respect them, they make me laugh and I think they each have their way of changing the world.

But they are manly men. Nothing sisterly about them. I love 'em, but that said, I want to write about the beauty of hanging out with the gals who have filled that sister gap.

My mama is still one of my best friends and one of the most servant-hearted women I know. She was an essential part of my "women's team" for many years, which has now expanded to include five lovely sister-in-laws and a mother-in-law--and I welcome the company!

Sisters just have a unique way of relating to one another and encouraging one another through life's twists and turns. Girlfriends are that way, too. No one but Stephanie and I know why hanging upside down on Nomi's monkey bars and shouting "This is sooo weird!" was all that fun. But we do. We have history.

No one but Becca, Connie and Julie know what in the world motivated us to move all our living room furniture outside by Union's fountain on a sunny day, or--well, that's the beauty of good friends ... I can't even write all our secrets and escapades here, but I bet they are giggling about them right now!

Talking to Keri and Julie always makes me want to praise, to pray, to be a better woman, but be content in who God has made me. And I could name more women who touch my heart like that.

My girl's prayer group in Denver filled my heart with true community and my life is definitely sorer for the lack of "pop-cultural references." (That was a sisterly insider phrase, if ya didn't catch it.) They taught me true hospitality, zest for life in a new life stage and modeled consistency in the midst of all kinds of messes and victories. I miss them.

I don't have anyone here in Oxford that I share very much history with (unless we're talking about all the amazing British history we're surrounded by here), but I have found a common bond in Christ with a handful of women at Wycliffe. We meet each Thursday to study a book of the Bible, have a cup of tea and share prayer requests.

I pray that one of these days, we might just smile over an inside joke or use the same catch phrase at the same time--or vacuum for each other because we're too pregnant to move.

But even if that doesn't happen anytime soon, I am grateful God has blessed me with like-minded women who love God, love their families and children, hunger for His Word and desire obedience. I believe company like that is worth keeping and I hope we sharpen one another.

So when people ask if I've found friends here ... yes, I have! We've exchanged some get-togethers with a few folks and made acquaintances and I'm excited about getting to know everyone more, but I know those deep relationships I treasure so much take time. This transition has grown my appreciation of those oldie-but-goodie friendships.

In the meantime, I am kissing the ground with thankfulness that God has placed me in a new opportunity to grow, provided potential friends and continues to bless me with the intimate friendships I've been part of pre-Oxford. So, I welcome the new, cherish the old and simply enjoy the now. Thank God for sisters!

A very British Christmas and a Happy New Year!

2010-01-03T15:43:00.000-08:00

The Official Christmas Report
A a few of my friends have asked me what differences we've discovered about the way Christmas is celebrated in the UK. A few observations:
-Christmas seems like a much more formal event. LOTS of going to church and listening to the angelic sounds of boy choirs. Everyone we know enjoyed a candlelit dinner on Christmas evening and we were in awe of the massive, richly decorated Christmas tree in our church (which looks like a cathedral inside). Gorgeous!!
-We discovered Christmas "crackers." These are not Christmas appetizers, but in fact are little presents with a small popper firework attached to the packaging. When you open your present with a "pop," candy and silly jokes spill out. Here was my joke:
"What do you say when you finally see pigs fly? I guess the price of bacon just went up!" (Nick and I thought it should have said "Now you have a bad case of swine flu (flew)." These cheesy joke companies should really hire us!
-We ate sticky toffee pudding, bread sauce and mince pies for the first time ... traditions our tummies will always welcome. We also ate something called "bubble and squeak" which we may not try to replicate any time soon (It's based on Christmas dinner leftovers, to give you an idea).
--Liam discovered the joy of wrapping paper. He loves the crinkle, he loves the crunch, and he, unfortunately, likes to munch! He was pretty sly. He would reach his tiny hands out toward whoever was sitting beside me as if to wave, then he would snag the paper and immediately try to ingest it. He'd finish with a huge smile, completely winning over whoever's paper he just tried to destroy. For the most part, I kept him to his own paper, but he made the most of it.
--We are so thankful for the Christmas cards, photos and care packages from our family and friends. It was fun to have some cute things under the tree and I loved hanging a Baby's First Christmas stocking. I couldn't wait until Christmas for most of the things that came in my care package, so we gradually opened them up in the days leading up to Christmas. Very fun to have Christmas for a month!

Mixing new and old traditions
We loved that we were able to celebrate Christmas as our own little family, sitting around the tree looking at the lights, listening to Bing croon away and sipping hot chocolate. We read some of the Scripture that foretells Jesus' coming and then read the Christmas story on Christmas day.

We ate Christmas dinner with the Edwards family (imagine six kids plus cousins, neighbors and grandparents and you can just imagine the fun and chaos. At one point, Liam had four little girls surrounding him on a blanket making faces at him. Our little socialite LOVED the attention!

When we opened a few little presents after dinner, I sat next to a sweet little old neighbor lady who had attended Oxford in the 1950s. She told me all about attending lectures by C.S. Lewis and Tolkien. According to her, Lewis had a barrel chest and a booming voice, but you couldn't hear a word Tolkien said unless you sat in the first three rows of the lecture hall.

Cookies across the globe--and other Christmas highlights

The week before Christmas, we enjoyed a biscuit (biscuit is the British word for cookie) exchange with people from our building (Summertown House). I had been wanting to get to know more of our neighbors and thought it might be a good chance to share a little about our Christmas traditions and the meaning behind them with people from all over the world.
Just as I was about to put out signs announcing a Christmas party for the building, Nick saw Ben and Deanna--the other American couple from Wycliffe--putting up cookie exchange signs. They were hoping to do the same thing! So we joined forces and brought our Christmas tree down to the common room for decoration (it was easy to move since it is only three feet high) and I baked 3 dozen big fat, butter-filled sugar cookies with homemade icing.
I was thrilled that I not only got to meet people from Egypt, Ghana and Georgia (the republic not the state), but I didn't even have to put up the posters! You can't get a better deal than that. I am so thankful for like-minded new friends like Ben and Deanna. They have been a great blessing to us here and we love living just down the hall from them. We even got to try out our double stroller with their daughter, Nora, inside when we babysat for them on Christmas Eve afternoon.

Nick and I topped off the holidays with a New Year's Eve at home eating homemade ginger cookies and watching fireworks from our balcony. The fireworks part was kind of a last-minute thought and we ran out barefoot in the FREEZING cold. I snagged Nick's boots from behind the balcony door, so we rang in the New Year each wearing one boot and hanging onto each other to stay warm! (I wasn't about to go back inside for more shoes and miss the glorious display!! Totally worth it. I still even have most of my toes.)

What was your favorite part of the holidays this year?

This is how Liam felt about America ...

2009-11-28T14:34:00.000-08:00

I caught Liam smiling in his sleep at Grandmama and Grandaddy Moore's house. Who knows what he was dreaming about, but I have to say, his face shows exactly how we both felt about hanging out with family in Texas and Missouri. Thanks for making our stay so comfortable and so much fun. We love you!

You never see growth happen until it's already happened!

2009-11-11T20:21:00.000-08:00

I was just looking at some great newborn shots of Liam that my friend Lindsay of Lindsay Carol Photography took, and I'm amazed at how much he's changed in 3 1/2 months! This little guy was just a lump of cuteness at ten days old. Now he's interacting socially, charming everyone with his smile, melting his mama's heart with every laugh. He's growing in independence every day, standing up (with my help) on those strong legs and exploring the world with his eyes, his fingers, and most definitely his mouth!!
But when did it happen? Although there are days when I could swear I see him growing in front of my eyes, it's a mystery. And I have a feeling his growth will continue just as mysteriously until I'm in awe of my baby graduating, marrying and even raising his own brood. I'm trying to capture and delight in every moment, not desiring to make time stand still, but to dive into the minutes and the seconds with Liam as he grows and fully experience life with him in the present. Wow, what a miraculous mystery it is to love and raise a child. I am blessed beyond measure.
(If you'd like to check out the newborn photos that Lindsay so artistically captured, the password is "ellis.")

Coming (back) to America and the Blessing Song

2009-11-01T13:50:00.000-08:00

This Thursday, Nick, Liam and I are going to hop a plane back to the States. Don't worry, we are not giving up on living here after just a month of settling in! We're going back to celebrate a very special occasion: the marriage of Nick's brother Ian and our lovely soon-to-be-sister-in-law Sonia Justl.

We are so excited for Ian and Sonia as they start this new adventure in their lives and we are looking forward to a Brazilian churrasco with them and singing "the blessing song"in their honor, a meaningful song that has become an Ellis family tradition. When Nick's family sang this to us when we married, they were bestowing blessings and promises on us that we could claim straight from God's Word and we endeavored to help those claims take deep root in our new little family.

As I listen to this song in preparation for their wedding, these promises come back to me so vividly. This is what Nick and I are striving for as the great and ultimate goal of our lives.The song is a reminder of all we have in Christ and who we are in Him. If you can get past the cheesy Christmas album background on the song, have a listen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vdn5EtyKXiI

The Blessing Song

The Blessing Song
by Dennis Jernigan

May the Lord answer you in the day of your trouble!
May the name of the Lord be your strong mighty tower!
May He grant you your heart's deepest dreams and desires!
May He answer each time you call!

May He pour out the blessing of heaven!
May you cast your cares on Him and daily fall!
May you live to see your children's children!
May Lord Jesus be your All in All!

May the Lord Jesus Christ satisfy beyond all measure!
May His Word light your path!
May His Peace guard your heart!
May your days be filled with gladness, joy and peace through any sadness
Filled with love that will not depart!

May your strength be renewed like the eagle!
As you run the race may joy flood every part!
May your memories all be sweet in each parting!
May the peace of Christ rule your heart!

May His word be to you health and life, joy and treasure.
May your home be a light.
May the Lord guard your ways.
May the Lord be your shepherd.
May His goodness and mercy follow after you all your days!

May His mercies be new every morning!
May His grace and Holy Spirit help you stand!
May you live your life to die for the gospel!
May you hold to His unchanging hand!

May the Lord answer you in the day of your trouble!
May the name of the Lord be your strong mighty tower!

Blessings on your dear friends. Can't wait to be just a bit closer to most of you very soon!

Boats on the Thames and Exclusive Claims (this title doesn't actually rhyme)

2009-10-28T16:50:00.000-07:00

We enjoyed a view of the River Thames on our country walk and stopped to watch swans swim lazily in the village of Wolvecote (a point of natural beauty "cared for by the Wolvecote commoners since time immemorial" according to the sign posted nearby--a long way of saying they can't quite remember when). The river, by the way, is pronounced as though it belongs to Tim, leaving my title completely empty of rhyme, much to my disappointment once I read it out loud.

Boating is a big deal here in Oxford, and though we moved here a bit late in the season to try punting, we are excited to "put our ores in" eventually.

We are enjoying making relationships with other families from a variety of different backgrounds (making Kashmerian curry at midnight with some new acquaintances for instance!).

We are also taking part in lots of conversations that could be described as singing the praises of pluralism. What a delicate dance it can be to talk about the exclusive claims of Christ with friends who cannot say enough about the beauty of INexclusitivity and tolerance.

Obviously, our faith is more than a system of thought and action, but actually a personal relationship as well. How do you talk about this with your friends without only dwelling on "warm fuzzy feelings?" (This is not a rhetorical question ... I'd love to hear your ideas and perspectives!)

Liam is amazing alert: He just rolled over twice the other day! We're reading a million books together these days (along with Nick, who's ALSO reading a million books these days--a bit stouter reading than Liam I have to say!).
Fun British fact:
People drive on the left side of the road in the UK, but I can't really tell that they WALK on the left side of the sidewalk*. You just have to do a little dance to make sure you don't rub noses with anyone by accident. I often plan my angle several meters in advance so I can give a good indication of which route I'm taking the Chariot in since people tend to get a little intimidated when I'm charging toward them with it ... I've been tempted to play chicken a couple times just to see what would happen.
*Vocabulary:
The word pavement= the sidewalk here in Oxford, not the road. So your children can play on the pavement, but can't run in the street.

Get thee to a nunnery!

2009-10-21T14:32:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pics from the nunnery ruins we visited a couple weeks ago. The nunnery was torn down by Henry the Eighth--who essentially decided to war against Catholicism so he could get a divorce. Talk about shaping your religion to your personal agenda!
While I'm not about to start tearing down nunneries, I have to admit I've been guilty of making Christianity--and my reading of Scripture--into a version that's convenient for me. This crazy king reminds me to let those things that aren't so comfortable be refiners in my life.

Here's a silly video of me on the brink of ruin--being sent to the nunnery by Nick :)

Sieze the ... night!

2009-10-20T01:46:00.001-07:00

I've been putting off posting to the blog because there are so many amazingly cool things I want to share with you and I wanted a big chunk of time to give them their due. But that hasn't happened yet. I think this blog might be a good lesson in my relationships with God and other people as well. You just can't wait for that huge, perfect stretch of time to take advantage of the relationship, you simply dive in, even in the (beautiful) messiness of life.

We did that last night with a cool Pakistanian/Bosnian family we met at a cell phone shop downtown. We randomly went over and hung out at 8pm and didn't go to bed until 1:30. Yes, I was tempted to turn down the invitation and stick with Liam's routine and have a quiet night, but then we would only continue talking about having a relationship with these folks and never actually do it if we waited for the perfect time. So I guess this is a Carpe Diem kind of week. I am paying for it a bit now, but so glad we made the choice to act on where God is leading us. While it was just a simple get-together, we think He has a kingdom purpose for us meeting this family. (Besides, we got to eat pizza, and how can you turn down THAT?)

The Trout Inn

2009-10-09T06:27:00.000-07:00

On the grand suggestion of our dear friend and former professor Hal Poe, Nick, Liam and I took a country stroll last weekend to the little village of Godstow to visit the Trout Inn.
This historic place was built in 1620--the newest addition in the 1860s! The area around the inn inspired parts of Alice in Wonderland and The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (if we can believe the fabulous little old man we met at the inn who told us a tale or two).
We enjoyed tea and cozy respite from the chilly afternoon, then--armed with a sturdy umbrella and a bit of curiosity--we went on to explore the ruins of the Godstow Nunnery.
The forested area and the open green with wood lounge chairs just across the bridge from the inn brought to mind images of Brits of yesteryear on holiday wearing straw hats and playing croquet. The stone lion statue on that side is a likely inspiration for Lewis's Aslan (we might be a bit skeptical, but it felt quite magical to imagine him opening his writer's notebook and jotting away as he sat at the edge of the river in view of the big stone cat).

Oxford Life

2009-10-08T09:53:00.000-07:00

Oxford is beautiful--full of medieval buildings, stately old brick and northern hardwoods that are just beginning to change color. Students in plaid skirts and v-neck sweaters lounge around the doors of shops and little old ladies in skirts, hats and slippers pedal furiously down the road and dodge buses like maniacs. A perfect city for pedestrians!

The majority of the city is actually the university itself, spread out in libraries and lecture halls and 27 separate buildings called colleges. Many of the buildings have a coat of arms and a gilded sign out front that declares the name of the college and sometimes what's studied there. The smaller ones resemble churches with statues and stained glass, the larger ones look like castles! In fact, Christ Church, one of the largest of the colleges, has its own cathedral inside and served as the setting for a Harry Potter movie.

The theology faculty library where Nick spends some of his time is an unobtrusive brick building very close to the Eagle and Child, a pub where Lewis and Tolkien and the rest of the "Inklings" use to sit in the Rabbit Room and discuss ideas.

The photos you see are a small piece of the Bodelian library (home to 800,000,000 books! More photos of that soon) and an Anglican church on our way into town.

Arrival in Oxford

2009-10-06T01:52:00.000-07:00

We arrived safely in Oxford in our sweet little one-bedroom flat in Summertown on Banbury Rd. (Just like in the nursery rhyme!). Nick and I ate toast and french apricot preserves and tea for dessert our first night and felt just the tiniest bit British. (Don't worry--we sing "Proud to be an American" to Liam every day.)
Liam spends his nights in his little sleeping bag that came with his stroller. We parked it on the dresser the first night, but have since moved it to the much safer location of the floor!

Fun British Fact for the Day: We are six hours ahead of Central Time. If you're having lunch in TN, we're having dinner in Oxford. (5 ahead Eastern, 7 ahead Mountain)

Vocab Lesson: The "checkout" or "cash register" is called the "till." I learned this when I went shop to shop asking for clothes hangers they want to recycle. One of my new friends told me this is a great way to stock your closet cheaply!

The Edwards Family
We are forever indebted to Timothy Edwards--a former professor at Oxford and a friend of a friend--who picked us up at the airport and brought us back to his house for breakfast.

The Edwards are a homeschooling family of six adorable kids who kept us in stitches with an endless creative agenda (in the space of two hours, 5-year-old Hannan made a hedgehog costume and a pirate outfit, mostly for our entertainment!).

I went grocery shopping with Anna Edwards to get a few things for our first week and she guided me through that first supermarket experience and softened the blow of sticker shock by showing me items that were "worth paying for." (Delicious jams, jellies and cooking oils were plentiful and lovely. Bone-in chicken, value-size anything, and cheap prices were noticeable absent.)

We prayed together, enjoyed laughing and comparing stories and accents, and visited church with them our first Sunday in Oxford. (Very solid, gospel-preaching church, super friendly. I met three other moms while I was in the back feeding Liam!). It's nice to meet passionate Christians from the very first day who know how to do family life well. Perhaps the Edwards will be good mentors for us. We love them!

A couple observations:

*In our flat, electricity's cheaper from midnight to 7am than during the day. A great reason to shower and do the dishes at 3am!

*In lots of shops, one long line of people wait for the first available cashier... no guessing which line will go faster ( the "choose which line" game used to be a favorite of mine at Walmart.)

Requests:

Pray for us as we figure out how to do the basics of life with a new baby. Liam is such a blessing and joy to our lives and he is adapting amazingly. He is also another transition for us! I don't feel I accomplish things quite as quickly as pre-baby, but God gives us grace to adjust to all the new blessings He brings our way and I know we will figure out ways of making life work.

Pray for Nick as he teaches Greek and begins researching. He meets his supervisor for the first time on Wednesday. He has quite a challenge as he is entering a very secular university as a strong believer, an American, and as a representative of one of the most evangelical of Oxford's colleges. There may be hurdles to overcome because of those three facts. But we are confident that God will work mightily and we are SO thankful for the opportunity to serve Him here.

Pray for Nick to tackle his academics with excellence, and that we will both be respectful but bold witnesses as we meet people from all over the world. (Five different countries were represented in our laundry room just a couple nights ago!)

Pray we will remember that the greatest wisdom comes from God and not any human endeavor.

Next time: The library with every book ever published in English!!

Crossing the Pond and Taking on United Airlines

2009-10-03T14:42:00.000-07:00

Crossing the Pond
If only I had taken a photo of our luggage carts as we stood in line at the Denver Airport! This would have been the caption: The Ellises and the world's largest amount of carry-on baggage and one HUGE stroller take on United Airlines.

Here's the photo I "staged" so you can get the idea (looks almost like the real thing, except we're a little heavier in real life--and so were our bags!)

Seriously, I felt virtually illegal traveling with our baggage so maxed out. Who knew a 14 lb. child could need so much stuff!?

When we got to our flat (apartment), I started pulling things out of my coat pocket (yes, I was using my pockets strategically) and out came a nursing cover, an exercise band, a pacifier, a diaper, lip gloss, a burp rag, a pack of wipes, a protein bar, a memory card, gum, 7 days of provisions and a life support system.

Okay, maybe not those last two, but pretty much everything else we needed to survive the plane trip that began at check-in 7am Tuesday and ended at 6:30 am UK time on Wednesday, Sept. 23. (An exercise band? You might wonder if I was planning on doing a little Pilates on the plane, but no, just happened to add it at the last minute as a token of hope for future exercise!)

Exciting moments from the plane ride:

Finally saw "The Proposal"

Dove to the floor during extreme turbulence on my way to change Liam (the stewardess made me dive, I wasn't just being dramatic. Promise!)

Nick held Liam for a while so I could get a some sleep. If you don't understand why this is exciting, you haven't yet had a newborn. :)

Liam slept like a … baby. Beautifully. I have to admit, I fed him a TON to help him stay quiet. (You didn't just read that, Babywise Fans :) He did fit in one live video for his Facebook fans. Nick commandeered my Facebook page from his iPhone to update everyone on our status.

United bumped us up to Economy Plus for FREE because they didn't have any bassinet seats in the bulkhead… five extra inches of leg room!! Thank you Nick for asking, "just in case there are seats."

The nice man next to me didn't mind when Liam's little feet crept past the arm rest once in awhile into the stranger's territory. Perhaps it helped that Liam's PJs had little puppy-dog feet … that tends to draw the "melt your heart" reaction. Blessings come in all forms!

Fun British Fact for the Day:
Dates are written opposite of the U.S., so we arrived in England on 23rd September.

Coming up next: Arrival in Oxford

Moving to Oxford: But first--our baby

2009-10-02T10:46:00.000-07:00

Just now, the most significant part of our lives is the fact that we just welcomed our son, Liam, into the world and moved to Oxford, England!

I hope to write lots about the people, places and ideas we encounter as we study here in the UK. I plan to post plenty of pictures that capture Liam taking in the best Europe has to offer (on a budget that is).

Liam
First, meet Liam Jameson Ellis. He made a grand entrance on July 20, 2009, weighing in at 9 lbs, 1 oz. We have been praying for him to be a man of God and that he will be a "strong willed warrior" and "resolute protector" in the name of our God. What a blessing and joy he is to our lives!

A little update
In a three month period, Nick and I have moved houses twice, first across the city, now to a new country. I was working full-time until after Liam was due while we moved, said goodbye, sold vehicles and furniture, packed for England, visited with friends and relatives in four different states and tackled breastfeeding, diapering and sleeping strategies in a whirlwind of getting ready to go and welcoming a brand-new baby into the world.

Big thanks to our families
Thank goodness we had so much wonderful help from my mom, dad and Cannon and Nick's mom, dad and Victoria, not to mention our great friends who have supported us all the way. We love our family so much and are forever grateful for the way they kept us going during such a time of transition. We miss you!!

High heels in pregnancy: Forbidden fruit? Why a cute T-strap can suddenly feel like your best friend.

2009-05-14T10:40:00.000-07:00

Today a fellow writer asked me about yet another potentially forbidden delight during pregnancy, and I just couldn't help but respond here. Her question: Do you wear high heels during pregnancy?

I must preface my answer with two facts you should know:
1) I live in Denver, where it seems almost everyone lives in North Face jackets, so I often don't have as many chances to dress up as I'd like. (Considering I'm a true Southern girl who would wear a formal evening gown to a Little League baseball game if it were socially acceptable, I will likely NEVER live in a place where peopled dress up as much as I'd like...unless I travel back to the antebellum era with Scarlett and Rhett...but that's beside the point.)

2) As much as I enjoy dressing up, I have a practical side (my college roommates would never agree, but I DO!). I am just shy of six feet, and I love to walk fast. So, even when I''m not "with child," you won't usually find me traipsing through the grocery store in five-inch stilettos (although I am occasionally jealous of the girls who do ... until I realize their bunions are almost as big as their back problems).

That said...

I adore cute AND comfortable shoes, so I thought I would be donning flats for most of my pregnancy, but…surprise! I’ve found an occasional high heel does wonders for my self-esteem. I found a pair of racy black T-straps at a consignment shop that are amazingly comfortable. I pull them out whenever I need a self-esteem boost. At a time when my belly is so big, and I often feel…less than delicate…the shoes make me feel pretty.

I’m almost 8 mos. pregnant and I try to only wear the heels for a portion of the day, not all the time. Why wouldn’t you want your legs to look longer and your calves to look more impressive when you feel a little like a blimp from time to time? (Don't get me wrong, it's totally worth it. But a happy blimp beginning to find her inner nurturer is a blimp nonetheless.)

I haven’t felt unsteady at all…but I think it’s important to choose shoes you’ve “road-tested” and know you can walk in without teetering on the edge of a fall. The straps on my favorite heels--and the fact that they aren’t unreasonably high--help a lot.

With all the "Thou shalt nots" of pregnancy, this is one that should be thoroughly enjoyed IF it's comfortable.